Review: SHINee–“Sherlock (Clue + Note)”

SHINee should…probably not quit their day jobs to become detectives.


Did you like the song?
WELCOME TO THE NAKEDNESS APPRECIATION POST! Ahem. *wipes drool*

In age order: Onew, Jonghyun, Key, Minho, and Taemin. (Or, if you switched Minho and Key, it would be in my order of increasing hotness. Just my opinion/biases.)
Okay, okay, hold up, because this is the first time I’ve written an entire post about SHINee, and I’m keen to gripe talk about them. At one point, around the time of the release of “Lucifer” (so, late 2010), I would have said without hesitation that SHINee was my absolute favorite band, Kpop or otherwise. Man, those were the days when I literally pulled all-nighters just to obsessively devour all of “Hello Baby,” which is still my favorite idol program (surpassed only by those episodes of “Exploration of the Human Body” in which DBSK was featured on Super Junior’s show—because, well, there was just too much hotness in that room).

But then guess what happened—SHINee up and disappeared for a year and a half, basically. (Hence the “SHINee’s back” line at the beginning of this song.) Now, I know they didn’t vanish from the face of the earth; they just went to Japan. But in my opinion, SM’s decision to take them to Japan was one of the worst moves they could have made at that time, at what I saw was the height of their popularity in South Korea. Because—again, in my opinion—what I saw SHINee releasing from Japan were horrible covers of their own songs that I cringed while watching because it seemed to me that they were regressing in Japan. They weren’t getting better, they weren’t developing new skills and learning new techniques; they were poorly re-hashing old ones. My one-time overwhelming biases, and I literally had trouble getting through the entirety of the Japanese version of “Lucifer.”

Eventually I stopped obsessively checking for updates as to their whereabouts and moved on to other groups, letting SHINee fall off my radar and hoping that when they decided to reappear in Korea, they’d be better for their traveling. In actuality all that happened was that they became hippies.

Jonghyun, Key, Onew, Minho, and Taemin.
And, well, I guess this song is good, but just not enough to convince me that they’re better than they were (although that’s subjective, of course). It definitely has a “SHINee feel,” sounding to me like a mixture of “Love Like Oxygen,” “Hello,” and “Juliette,” it’s just…not as good. (Correction: it is definitely better than “Hello.” But I legitimately hate that song.) I guess my main issue is that it seems to take a really long time to get going, and I get impatient for that gorgeous chorus.

What was your favorite part of the song?
Speaking of which, SHINee’s trademark is the lovely, sweeping transition from the verses to the chorus, which usually makes the song, and “Sherlock” is no exception. The chorus with its superb “I’m so curious, yeah” line is unquestionably the best part of this song. But I find that the verses are not particularly good.

Does the English make you want to rip your eardrums out?
…and I especially dislike all the unnecessary self-referential parts (specifically the “give it up [for SHINee]” part, which was repeated six times). I understand the point of name-dropping yourself once in a song, at the beginning, so people know who you are, but asking listeners repeatedly to “give it up,” which to me means “give us a standing ovation,” seemed supremely arrogant and then awkward because there was very little swagger in this music video. Self-referential lines + swagger = tolerable, if irritating. Self-referential lines without swagger = strange and unsettling.

I did, however, immensely enjoy the English in the prestigious New York News newspaper, renowned of all publications, paragon of journalistic professionalism. Even if I’d hesitate to call our amateur sleuths “GREAT DETECTIVE SHINEE” (yes, in the singular).

Superb work, Mr. Editor In Chief.
Did you like the video?
Heh. Well. Let me preface this by saying I MOCK BECAUSE I CARE.

Guys, I have so many complaints about this music video that I feel really bad that it’s the first thing I’m posting after my unexpected hiatus. But what can I do? When something’s unsatisfactory, it’s not like falsely praising it will improve it.

So the boys are all living together in this dusty, washed out steampunk universe. (How else can you explain all the old-timey, Victorian stuff juxtaposed with…a laptop? Why does Key get a laptop while Onew has to peck away at a typewriter?) They have a loft (which looks…strangely familiar…almost reminiscent of that stupid brick room that has inexplicably featured in many music videos lately). Still, I guess they have to live somewhere. I just wish they didn’t have a staircase to nowhere in their actual apartment. It makes me very nervous.

The literal Stairway to Heaven.
And I also don’t really see the point in a huge bookshelf…that has the top three shelves empty because nobody can reach it. But I’m unnecessarily focusing on the set and props.

Another thing is their costumes. At times, they look like they really fit into the scene of pseudo-Victorian era clothing. I was totally digging Key’s hipster glasses and the monochromatic suits and the hint of the boys rocking the tweed. And top hats! And suspenders!

Onew, Taemin, Jonghyun, Minho, and Key.
But then suddenly—bam!—hippies. Shorts with stars on them, tennis shoes, and I swear to God Taemin is wearing a Native American poncho.

Some questionable design decisions. (Key, Taemin, Jonghyun, Onew, and Minho.)
I don’t want to know where Onew’s weird fishnet vest thing came from. People refer to “fishnet stockings,” but what he’s wearing looks like it may actually be a net for catching fish in.

The anachronisms start to give me a headache after a while, so let’s just move on.

Was there a storyline? If so, did it make sense?
Let me put it plainly: I don’t know why they named this song “Sherlock” because this case is too dumb for Sherlock Holmes to take on.

So let me get this straight: there is missing jewelry in a museum, and the police are of course blind as well as utter morons, so they call in the SHINee consulting detective squad. SHINee helpfully points out the “clues” as to where the missing jewelry might be, which they discovered by the top-notch sleuthing means of picking stuff up off the damn floor. (Uh—how slow are they, exactly? And is this really a burglary? It seems more like a museum worker took the jewelry into a back room for cleaning or something.) Anyway, in the meantime a helpful ghost keeps appearing and giving clues to the guys separately (and then mysteriously disappearing), and nobody ever mentions it. Minho takes a picture with his huge old camera, at least, so it’s clear that friendly ghost!Jessica (from SNSD) can be photographed, but he never seems to show the picture to anyone (except at the end when it’s on the desk).

Um, let me tell you, if I were working a case and an apparition kept turning up, the first thing I would do is freak the hell out and run away. Then I would probably do a little screaming and questioning of my sanity. I assume at this point, my four hot roommates would notice that something was A Little Off and would ask me what was wrong. Then I would point out that I’d seen something that I thought was a ghost, but obviously couldn’t be, because ghosts are not real.

Then guess what would happen?! All four of my hot roomies would say at the same time, “Oh, yeah! That happened to me, too!” Then we’d commiserate over our collective hallucination (and possibly sign up for group therapy). And then realize that if we’re collectively and separately hallucinating, probably Something Is Up, i.e. we’re dealing with a supremely confident, lunatic genius of a jewelry thief who is just taunting us with all the clues about her identity she’s dropping all over the place (which include the actual location of the stash of stolen crap).

Yes, guys. It really is this easy. No, really.
Possible scenarios for how this could be a brilliant crime in reality include fooling the detective force via: aerosol drugs, dummies, holograms, projectors, or a combination of all of that or something else. But you know what I would not do? Assume that the ghost is real, used to be a girl from 1910 whom a statue was made of, and then shrug and move on.

“Yup, seems plausible. Okay, case closed!” WHAT?!
I do, however, appreciate the little Holmesian touches the props department has attempted to include, like Key’s iWatson laptop, Onew’s magnifying glass, Taemin’s violin, the foggy noir-esque streets and smoky streetlamps, and the 221 address to ghost!Jessica’s hidden room (though really, shouldn’t it be 221B? *picky fan is picky*).


Onew striking a very Holmesian pose.
But it has to be said: Sherlock Holmes would not consider a case closed when the only solution is that there is actually a real ghost. Holmes is a very scientific and logically-minded character, neither of which is consistent with believing in ghosts. I’m not sure whether he would laugh or weep at the ineptitude with which SHINee handled this case.

It’s okay; many ills can be solved via Taemin-with-a-violin.
Was the dance cool and distinctive?
Cool? Of course. It’s SHINee. Distinctive? Eh, not really.


This dance—the SHINee signature in music videos, if you will; the thing everyone looks forward to seeing—was something of a letdown for me. I mean, it was definitely the best part of the video, don’t get me wrong—this is a SHINee MV, after all! And of course it has a bunch of interesting moments…but they didn’t really coalesce for me. I didn’t get an overall feel for the dance or understand why they used particular moves. And I disliked the parts where the boys all cross their arms and take huge, loping, strutting steps forward. It looked rather unintentionally comical to me.

However, there are very compelling moments throughout, even if they are a bit disjointed. For example, I loved the various spinning and wave moves and especially the move where they go crisply into a squatting position. Very cool.

Uh, this part, kind of? I couldn’t find a good gif. *cries*
Do the members look good?
I know, I know, here is the point where people start asking why I can’t just shut up and appreciate that Taemin’s hair extensions are back. But down that road is a black hole from which only a few mortal humans emerge intact.

Still, I suppose we can spend some time being literally mesmerized.

Hours later…Was that puddle of drool there before?

Taemin: turning otherwise normal people into pedophiles since 1993. (Though technically that makes him 18, so no more pedophilia? Yay…) For more sultry!SHINee, check out the other promo pictures here.

Taemin has solidly arrived as one of the most gorgeous people in Kpop right now. It’s true that I’m a hugely biased fan of his, but I’m certain that his gorgeousness isn’t just my subjective opinion; it’s an actual fact.

As for the other members, Jonghyun and Minho always look very hot and intense. But I have a bone to pick with SHINee’s stylists this time around re: Onew and Key. Onew needs careful handling with his Condition, and he didn’t seem to get it here. I mean, that one moment where he’s fingering the magnifying glass is sexy as hell, but his terrible parted-down-the-middle hair?—never again, please, stylists.

Too weird for words.
Key looks totally stunning…when you can actually see his eyes and when he’s not wearing, like, my grandmother’s pink shawl. But most of the time it’s this:

Hair in the eyes: a fangirl’s nightmare.
Other than Jonghyun, Minho is the only one who really looked into the camera for any length of time (while simultaneously not having his hair falling in his eyes). But even he seems capable of only one expression here, looking strangely pained or angry in his close-ups.

Why so accusatory, Minho?
Which member stood out the most?
Although for me personally, it was and will always be Taemin, I think in general either Jonghyun or Minho stood out the most, mainly because they seemed to have the most closeups.

Jonghyun.
Do you like it enough to buy the song?
Yes, I do. Good Lord, I certainly complained a lot earlier about a song I know I’m dishing out money on pretty much no matter what because it reminds me of “Juliette.” Seriously, I’ve been listening to “Juliette” about twice a day for about two years now and am still not sick of it. I’m hoping the lovely, lovely chorus of “Sherlock” will be good enough to stand the test of time also and to overcome the slow start to the song.

Onew, Taemin, Jonghyun, Minho, and Key.
Any ending thoughts?
This MV has been very strange for me as a huge fan of both BBC’s Sherlock production and SHINee’s new album. (But seriously, if you haven’t seen Sherlock, please do. It’s quite short! And then come back and discuss it with me!) Here, have a picture:

Benedict Cumberbatch (Sherlock Holmes) and Martin Freeman (John Watson).
Anyway, mostly I’ve been scarfing down popcorn while laughing hysterically due to the wank because both fandoms were fighting over the #sherlock tag on tumblr. :)

Also: why is there an ad embedded on the official release of the music video? I’m willing to put up with a lot from SM, but really? It’s for reasons like this that I’ve started automatically replacing SM with sadomasochism in my head whenever I read it.

Boyfriend’s one-liner:
[After getting our obligatory “No, Taemin is not a woman” discussion out of the way.] “How do you have a video called ‘Sherlock’ without some homoerotic tension with Watson?” Which of course makes me wonder if I can argue for Key/laptop iWatson homoerotic tension? Probably a stretch.

Elementary, my dear iWatson.
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